FUNK

I'm going to be honest here people.  I am in a FUNK!  I'm trying not to be but I can't help it.  I have been lazy, a major lack of energy, patience, drive or ambition.  I keep comparing how I am feeling this year to the way I felt last year and I don't like it.  My therapist has instructed me to not do this because it may be contributing to my funk but honestly I can't help it.  I just plain felt better last year.  I'm sure that a lot of it has to do with me being in a regular workout routine last year (there is something said for endorphins) and this year I haven't been able to find that rythm. 

Have you noticed I haven't had any weekly weigh ins?  The honest truth is because I HATE doing them lately.  I have gained and I'm NOT happy!  I weighed in last week for a challenge with my Zumba instructor and weighed in at 228 lbs.  That's up 5 lbs from last year at this time.  I have been struggling with those same 5 lbs for quite some time.  I started to plateau and then got discouraged, workouts became fewer and fewer, eating habits became worse and I started to care less.  My mindset was why put in the effort if it's not going to reflect on the scale or with my clothes?  Not the one you should have!

In reality 5 lbs is not that much but I can feel every single one of those 5 lbs.  Running is not as easy as it was when I was down to 221, not that it was easy at that weight either, but you know what I mean.  I was way happier with how I looked then as opposed to now. 

I KNOW that when I exercise and eat better that I feel better about myself but I am struggling with finding the right balance.

I mentioned my challenge.  It's a 7 month challenge with prizes each month.  My whole heart isn't in it but I'm hoping that it will help some.  I did get an advantage though.  I started shark week the same day that the challenge started so I'm hoping that I'll shed some water retention at the end of this week when I weigh in.  although, the Hubs is coming home tomorrow so then again...maybe not?!

I got my bodybugg a year ago but haven't used it since summer started.  I don't like how you can see it and was afraid of tan lines during the summer.  I'm not a huge fan of how you have to upload the info off of the armband and the food input is very time consuming.  It also doesn't link to your smartphone which is a huge inconvenience.  My mom offered to buy me another membership for Christmas but instead she's going to get me the fitbit ONE.  It does everything that the bodybugg does and more.  It will link to my iPhone and the best part is, you can clip it to your bra and have it out of sight of others.  I'm really excited to start it!

I talked to Jim tonight about rejoining the Y.  Not only will I get my fitness on but I'll also get a bit of  "me" time that I always seem to be lacking.  I think I might try going as a visitor with one of my friends to see how Ryan does in the daycare.  I love that they offer all kinds of classes to change things up and I love that we always have the option of going swimming during the winter months.  I've asked two friends to see if I could go as a visitor so we'll see how it works out.

So, I'm hoping that these two things will help shake this funk I'm in, wish me luck!